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...it didn't, but it seemed that way.

So I guess I'm over the worst of the crash and into the rather charming melancholy stage. It could be a lot worse... Also my throat now merely tickles and I feel I could eat anything except crusty rolls or razorblades, which is better than feeling as if I am eating razorblades.

I notice I now have more people listing me as a friend than I have friends listed (excluding communities). This is a bit of a first for me, and I'm going to bask in the glow for a bit before I crack and add you all.

I also can't help noticing that several people seem to think that I give good advice for life. This is very flattering but makes me feel that I ought to be doing more than wittering on about sore throats and envelope stuffing. So, um... here is some advice for life.

  1. Give yourselves time to recover from BiCon. I'm glad that this year the use of LJ means that we are aware of the crash, and that other people are having it. Last year there seemed to be more restraint about saying that we were feeling low, which meant that some people felt that they'd had a uniquely miserable time.
  2. Don't rub other people's noses in your happiness. This is particularly important if you have a new relationship, pulled, or generally had more fun than them. It's hard to feel that you didn't 'live up to' BiCon by having enough fun.
  3. Do try to keep in touch with all your new little chums, but don't put too much pressure on them to mail/visit/shag you. Many of us are out of time, money or enthusiasm right now, and going 'Oh go on, go on' doesn't help.


I've also been thinking today about what we would mean by 'sin' if we ever used the word. This thought started years ago when a Mad Evangelist cornered Paul and told him that 'we all sin every day'. Of course, most of what he would call 'sin' is what we would call 'fun', and if he really meant every day I can only assume he was including masturbation, which makes me go eek.

I realised then that I could never hold a set of beliefs which defined very much of what I do as sinful, because to me, doing wrong is very serious and I would worry if I did it often, whereas to some religious people it seems that confession is good for the soul, and the more you beat your breast about how bad you are, the better you are, which has to be nonsense.

On the other hand it's not true that I never do wrong things at all, or that all of the things I'm 'tempted' to do have to be right. If I try redefining 'sin' as 'breaking my own moral code' there are a few sins that regularly tempt me, and most of them I have committed at least once in my life. These are things like:-
  • Reading other people's private diaries or letters (much easier to avoid now LJ lets me peek ethically).
  • Stealing from individuals (it's a long time since I've done that, and I was very ashamed.
  • Breaking an agreement with a partner about who I'm allowed to sleep with.
  • Stealing books from libraries or otherwise taking from public resources that I respect. (I resisted taking a book from the library at College Hall, and felt very virtuous, because the temptation was very great.)
  • Betraying a confidence.

It seems to me that my moral code is stronger now because I have banished such 'sins' as consensual hedonism, disobedience to authority and eating cream cakes. (Fortunately for me masturbation never even featured.) I also no longer shoplift, but that's not because I think shoplifting is generally wrong (unless it's a small shop) so much as because I don't need to any more.

So anyway, I don't know where all that was going, but some serious ethical thought seemed to be demanded of me, so there it is!

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
babysimon
22nd Aug, 2002 04:37 (UTC)
I've also been thinking today about what we would mean by 'sin' if we ever used the word. This thought started years ago when a Mad Evangelist cornered Paul and told him that 'we all sin every day'. Of course, most of what he would call 'sin' is what we would call 'fun', and if he really meant every day I can only assume he was including masturbation, which makes me go eek.

It's more eek-y than that. According to christianity, everyone sins - not just people who wank. Anyway, I don't wank every day, and I'm sure the mad evangelist doesn't either. Try really really hard to be a good christian, and you'll still be a miserable sinner.

If you didn't sin, you wouldn't need their god's help, would you?
(Deleted comment)
purplerabbits
22nd Aug, 2002 05:18 (UTC)
No but,
feeling guilty every day certainly would be, though...
(Deleted comment)
ergotia
22nd Aug, 2002 05:26 (UTC)
Re: No but,
I feel guilty all the time!
valkyriekaren
22nd Aug, 2002 07:23 (UTC)
Re: No but,
I rarely feel guilty. Often embarrassed, occasionally remorseful, but guilty, no. Possibly because usually if I've screwed up, I put my hands up and admit it, and do what I can to sort it out.

Guilt, like jealousy, is an emotion I can't think of a good use for.
purplerabbits
22nd Aug, 2002 07:29 (UTC)
Re: No but,
Guilt and remorse are very similar to me. Guilt is what I feel before I process the feeling and decide whether I've done something wrong. if I have, I try to come to terms with that and apologise and maybe make reparations and feel remorse. If I haven't I thwap the guilt over the head with my meme hammer until I feel better. Fortunately that's becoming less and less neccessary over time.
hfnuala
22nd Aug, 2002 07:37 (UTC)
Re: No but,
Control. It's useful for patriarchy and other controlling social structures. Religions are big fans of it too - especially Catholicism. Nothing else works as well as the poilceman in your head.

I would mention the panopticon here, but that would be pretentious.
lilithmagna
22nd Aug, 2002 12:00 (UTC)
Very sage. Purpplegrasshoper?
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )